My year from hell September 5, 2008

Please tell me every teacher has good years and bad years because I am having the worst year so far and I am trying to convince myself it is not me!!! With that sad, I have not been getting home until at least 6:30 every night since we started school. I am continuing to keep running as a pleasure and release not an obligation (though it is) but I just cant have the mentality it is something on my to do list, because that is too long as is everyday. Running is becoming my release. I ran 5 last night, in the night and it was awesome. I got so much out and came to work the next morning refreshed.

I cant write much tonight…it is nearly 9 and I am just now laying down on the sofa to relax with Nick. Oh yeah, I am going back to school in the spring (or next fall)…I am just getting so fed up with the way public schools work. I will go into that later I have so much to write about but I am just way too exahusted tonight…it will have to wait until tomorrow.

Where has the last month gone?-Kirsten September 1, 2008

Yes, indeed it is me, finally. The truth is I am reading the blog, and realizing more with each day I need to get back into writing to hold myself accountable. I could not agree more, WHY ARE WE RUNNING A MARATHON? A half, that seems within my reach now, after doing my first 10 miles a few days ago, but add 16 to that, yeah thats a bit much!

Let me back up first. When we started this training program I have a summer free attitude; I could run when I wanted, sleep when I wanted, eat when I wanted, everything was not based around the hours on the clock. Well, 3 weeks ago I began teaching which is when my training became the hardest it ever has. I wake up at 5:45 to get to school, and there is no way I would run in the mornings. Then because of the wild class I have this year, I have been staying at work until close to 6 every night. Getting home at 6 after working with 23 5 year olds leads you to one goal; the couch and a drink. But add on a 5 mile run first!! Well it took me two weeks to get back into my routine, and now I am into my teaching groove and back into my running. I stopped blogging because I felt so behind…

But I am up to 10. I am not following the schedule exactly which maybe I should. One day I felt like running 6 when I only had to do 5, and then next day I only ran 3 when I have 4 to run. Doesnt that cancel eachother out, or is that a bad idea when training? I talked with a friend of mine who told me, it is ok to stop and walk. It doesnt mean you failed at your run, most people training use interval training techniques. So, the big numbers shall be conquered…one foot at time, with a few stops to walk when needed. I feel good mentally and physically which is the pay off for all of this. When I had my weeks of not running like I should have been, mentally I was all over the place. I had no place to release my stress and I felt horrible for not running. I actually dont mind the running…depending on the heat that is. If there are hills and heat I would rather curl up and die and every sprinkler I see on, I run into. I look like an idiot but hey it might have been what kept me from falling over and having a heart attack at age 24. I did my run on Saturday…8 miles. (I TOLD YOU I AM ALL OVER THE PLACE WITH THE SCHEDULE!!!) and the heat was 88, the incline was hell, and it hurt each step…so today I am waiting for the evening time. It is already too hot!!!

So about this half marathon in October….yes? no?

4 miles- Silvia August 29, 2008

Yesterday I should have run six miles according to the schedule.  I did 4.  I was exhausted. That’s my excuse.  The night before I couldn’t sleep well…first day jitters…even after 8 years of teaching!  Then when I finally could sleep, my darling husband began snoring.  Loudly.  I went downstairs to sleep in my son’s room (he’s off to college) and my dog decides it would be fun to play fetch at 3 am, and drops a tennis ball near my face.  I don’t think so.  I throw the ball away.  Duhhhh.  This is a dog.  Throwing the ball means playing fetch!  The tennis ball with drool was dropped neatly by my nose again.  This time, I put the ball in a drawer.  I couldn’t see his sad puppy dog eyes in the dark, so I felt OK about it.  I saw his shadwo lying in frot of the drawer, perhas willing it to open.  Eventaully he gave up and went away.  Meanwhile, it is 3:20 and I am trying desperately to get to sleep.  But there is added stress.  There is no alarm clock in my son’s room.  So, you know the kind of sleep you get when you know you have to wake up at a certain hour and there is no alarm clock to let you know the time and so you wake up every 20 minutes and look at the clock and feel relived that you have more time and mad because you woke up and you didn;t have to yet…well that’s what I had for the next 2 and half hours.  I arrived blearly eyed for the my first day of the new school year in a classroom full of high energy, eager middle schoolers.  Help me Lord geth through the day.  I did.

But the run.  Whose idea was it anyway to run this marathon?  I did not want to.  I wanted to go home, eat some food that I didn’t cook, have  a glass of wine and go to bed (before my husband so I fall asleep before he starts snoring).  But the run. I had to do that damn run.  I got home around 7:00.  I went to the gym.  I got up on the treadmill and at a mile 1.01 I was ready to call it a day.  I miss way back when I only had to run a couple of miles.  Nonetheless, I carried on and stopped at four.  I justified it by saying I’ll run 6 on Friday.

Today is Friday.  I finished day two in a classroom of energetic middle schoolers.  Do you think I feel like runnning six today?

Good-bye 3, Hello 4 – Silvia August 19, 2008

Week 6 was a milestone of sorts.  No longer would I have two 3 mile runs.  No, 3 miles are a thing of the past, it is now 4.  I remember when 4 was my longer middle run and now it is the norm.  I am writing this post because I dont want to do 4 miles today.  I would do 3, but 4 is so much longer.  Unfortunately the rain stopped and my run is looming over my head.

Last week I was visiting my mom.  She lives in the country, an hour north of Toronto. I ran the four miles along a dirt road that was pock marked with huge mud puddles, more like mini-ponds and holes.  There were ATV tracks all over the place.  Great for that, bad for running, unless you are a dog.  My dog had fun, dodging the puddles.  And when he was hot and tired he just lay in them, waiting for me to catch up.  Not me.  I tiptoed around them – secretly grateful for the chance to slow down and creep along.

The dirt road became very familiar during week 6.  It was about 2 miles long and I ran up and down for my  4 mile run.  I think I ran an extra mile I had to dodge the holes and water so much.  But my Garmin didn’t register all my agile weaving. I think it should give me extra mileage for all that effort.

“Vacation” at Ace Adventure Resort in West Virginia August 9, 2008

This is Rams Head Cliff as seen from the mountain bike trail across the gorge.

My husband thought it would be fun to do an outdoor vacation this year. We packed up the car and drove about 6 leisurely miles south to Oak Hill, West Virginia for a fun-filled week of whitewater rafting on the Gauley and New Rivers, mountain biking, rockclimbing and rapelling, and horse back riding. Sounds like a blast, eh?

Well, for me, who has done none of these things before, it was one stomach in my throat activity after another. I was sacred to the point of tears every single day. I have to admit, the first day of rafting down the Lower New was exhilarating after the initial fear was over. I even jumped off the 25′ “Jumping Rock.” It was so scary, but I was wearing a PFD and after watching 20 other people do it, I had to. I jumped and plunged into the warm 75 degree water. It was thrilling to challenge my fear of heights. At the end of the day I thought this rafting business is not so bad.

http://www.americanwhitewater.org/content/River_detail_id_2378#rapid141

The second day was a different story. We went on the Upper Gauley in single man “duckies.” Duckies are like inflatable kayaks or rafts. I was terrified. The Upper Gauley was supposed to be the most difficult whitewater in the area. After just one day on the gentle Lower New River in a big 14′ boat with a guide on board I was not ready for such a difficult challenge. When we got in our duckies I thought, what the hell was I thinking. The water was 60 degrees, freezing compared to the New River. We rolled out of our duckies into the cold river to practice getting back in because “if you can’t do it in calm water how will you do it in the rapids.” (There was a comforting thought.) The guides were supportive, funny and helpful. Nonetheless, I “swam” (the rafting word for falling out of your raft) many times and I every time I got more and more scared. I would have been so happy just to leave my boat ashore and hike my way out. Unfortunately, once you start there is no turning back. When I fell into the Class V Iron Ring rapid, it felt like I was under for about 3 minutes, but the guides assure me it was only for a few seconds. I remember finally coming out of the water and one guy with bulging muscles was just hanging onto my PFD and I was so grateful that he had me. I grabbed his rope and then he said let go and grab the other guides rope and he will push me in the Flume (that was a chute of water, like a water slide made of rocks and emptying into churning whitewater, that take you away from the dangerous part of the rapid-we all jumped into that for practice as well). I didn’t want to let go of anything! But I did because they were yelling at me, and grabbed the other rope. The guide pulled me to the flume and away I went through the chute and saw my husband once i came up from under that water. He had my duckie and paddle which already floated down the rapid. From then on I was terrified and just got progressively worse. Fear is not something that helps you paddle through whitewater. Finally, the last rapid was more my speed – I forget what it was called, but it was actually fun, so I am sure it was a Class 1 or something. When we reached terra firma, I was relieved, especially since on the bus ride back, the guides told us someone actually died in the Iron Ring rapid the previous year.

The next day, we did Mountain Biking. I mistakenly thought it would be along a gravel path, with a few rolling hills. Oops, I forgot that my husband planned this vacation. We went up big hills, down steep hills filled with rocks and roots. We pedaled through mud and along paths that were about 3 feet wide with a huge gorge on one side. To make matters worse there was a huge thunderstorm that just stopped right before the ride. This was not the leisurely ride through abandoned towns that my husband promised me. Nonetheless, I biked that 19 miles through rocky terrain and although I was basically biking alone because my husband and the guide were so far ahead of me, after each mile, I gained more confidence in myself and my bike with its big fat tires.

The next day in hell consisted of rappelling off a 180 foot cliff called Ram’s Head. I remember looking up at it from the New River while rafting and also across at it when we were mountain biking. Rappelling off the cliff was so terrifying that I was in tears. Our guide, Josh, was so patient and encouraging and helped me go over the edge inch by inch. I am so scared of heights, that even going over a high bridge gives me the heebie jeebies in my legs. I can’t believe that I hung over the edge and went down, not once but I had to do it twice so I could get a picture of myself going down. After we went mountain climbing and my husband was a downright spider man scrambling up the cliffs. I was a slug and only made it part way, but I was Ok with that.

The last day was supposed to be relaxing. A nice horse back ride. I have never been on a horse and I had to stand on a picnic table to get on it becuase George was so big. We went over the rolling mountainous terrain and I marveled at how close the horses got to the edge of the gorge and yet they didn’t slip off the trail (Thank GOD!). They navigated over rock flides and huge logs over the road. By the middle of the 13 mile ride, I was more relaxed and actually enjoyed myself. The horses just walked, so my husband was not thrilled with the ride, but this day was about me!

This blog though was about running not my terrifying vacation. The two are analogous though. I did tings this week, which totally stretched me beyond my limits and yet I did them with a lot of people’s support and patience. All the guides at Ace were wonderful! I know i can run this marathin with the support of my friends and family who want to see me succeed at something else that seems impossible right now.

Running at Ace was awful. I ran 2 3 mile runs and one 5 mile run during this week. I was grateful for my Garmin 405, which told me that the first hill I had to climb was 0.6 miles long and when I inputted the data the elevation I ran ( if you want to call it that) was about 200 plus feet. By the time I reached the top I was exhausted. I ran it 3 times and each time my time was slower! Only the top was flat and during my five mile run (which I ran after the 19 mile mountain bike ride) I took advantage of it and zigzagged around campsites so I can get rid of 1.5 miles on flat terrain. After the mountain camp sites, I ran past the stables, and around the property going up and down and up and down and up and down (there is no flat in West Virginia). I loved looking at my Garmin to see how many miles I had left; I did not like seeing how slow I was going. My pace ranged from 9:30 to 18 minute miles. No Kidding! After each run I was exhausted, and although my average pace was about 11 minutes, I finished. And this week, just finishing was good enough for me.

8 miles with the Garmin Forerunner 405 – Silvia August 2, 2008

When I got home from Columbus I was greeted with a present from my loving husband.  It was a Garmin Forerunner 405.  What is that, you ask?  Well, its a GPS-enabled sports watch with wireless sync.  At first, I thought it would show me little maps where I could run and avoid nasty stuff like hills, but it’s not like that.  You can go for a run and then it can take you back home using a compass like feature.  I didn’t use that feature.  I don’t even know how to use that feature yet.  I just used the Training mode to show how far I ran and what pace.  It was like running with my treadmill!  I could see how far I still have to go and the time.

This run I took Barclay, my border collie.  I am happy to report that when I untangled him from the leash at around mile 5, he did’t stand there to wait, he actually lied down!  I was gleefully delighted.  Tired, are we, little doggie?  At mile 6.77 I was dying.  I wanted it to be over already.  I looked at my pace and it said 14:48 minute miles. No kidding!  I was practically walking!  What is more shocking I felt I was running!  At mile 7.9 0 sprinted the last bit and I only reached a 9:34 min/mile pace.  I did the 8 miles in 1 hour and 24 minutes, which is about a 11/mile pace.  I am not upset.  That’s why I am training for this marathon.  I realize that it is hard work and it may not look pretty but I can do it!

Right now I am going to download the software for the Garmin.  A new tech toy!  I’m in heaven!

7 miles (more than 1/4 a marathon!) – Meghan July 28, 2008

Hi everyone! Sorry that I have not posted in a few days. I have been pretty busy with studying, working on a presentation, and working on residency application stuff. I have been keeping up with my runs though! I’m in a great mood tonight because I just finished my 7 mile run! It is amazing to think that we are more than a quarter of the way there! I ran outside and it was such a pleasant run. Great temperature, not humid, no blazing sun. I think I might try night runs from now on. So this is the week that we have decided to hold at (3 miles, 4 miles, 3 miles, 7 miles = 17 miles/wk). I think that is a manageable number of miles to hold at. It was nice to hear Kirsten’s reasons for why she wants to run this marathon and I actually have most of the same reasons. I feel so proud when I tell people I am running a marathon and remembering that feeling helps during those last 10 minutes or so when all you want is the run to be over. I also am personally looking forward to a weekend in Arizona during the Columbus winter, another source of motivation for me Well, I need to get to bed. I have a rough week ahead of me with a radiology presentation, radiology test, and then my BIG IMPORTANT boards on Saturday. Where am I going to fit running into this? Actually, I am looking forward to using my runs as a study break! Week 3 done!! Wahoo! Congrats guys!

A quote book… July 25, 2008

Ok, Nick and his brother are playing Wii and I am reading about running (story of my life!) and I had another idea..so lets say some days we just don’t have much to say…lets post a quote for each other. Something you read or found online that really stood out to you for that day…here is my first one for you guys!

“There are people who have no bodies, only heads.  And many athletes have no heads, only bodies.  A champion is a man who has trained his body and his mind, who has learned to conquer pain for his own purposes. A great athlete is at peace with himself and at peace with the world; he has fulfilled himself.  He envies nobody.  Wars are caused by people who have not fulfilled themselves.”

The Why’s… July 25, 2008

Two days ago while driving back from the gym, I told Nick that I felt so far from our goal and that at this point it seemed like I was reaching for the impossible. He then looked at me and asked me why I am doing this training. I told him a few reasons, and he suggested that I write them down and at moments of feeling discouraged, go back and read them. Well what better place to do it then here on our blog. He told me a few of his friends wrote a page about why they were enrolling in medical school so in moments of uncertainty they could remind them self of why…

I realized in that moment I had not taken enough time to think about the whys…aside from the obvious love I have for food. So I am writing my why, and will use this as motivation for myself. I am running this marathon to satisfy a personal goal. In a sense I want to learn how to train my mind, because I think having power over your mind is a powerful tool to use in all aspects of life. I have always struggled with the fact that many times in my life I have given up on things when they got too hard; but now I am ready to push myself in a way I don’t think I ever have. I am running this marathon to feel good physically and mentally; starting the day with a run, for me, is the most fulfilling. I am happier when I run and stay active. I am running this marathon for the reaction I get from others and the fact that I have always wanted to say I ran a marathon. If a 65 year old man can run one a year after a heart attack, a 24 year old can push her body to the same level. I running this because I am a goal setter and I cannot wait for the satisfaction I will feel of fulfilling and reaching a goal of mine. I am running this for all the cliches I have written about…this is for me…this is something I can call my own, and that I am finishing by myself, even though I running this with two awesome people. I am running this marathon for Meghan and Silvia, because if I somehow keep you all going the way you keep me going, I can’t back down…

So thank you for anyone who reads this, because seeing that someone else cares about this marathon makes it easier to push through the hard days.

Twenty Six…point two July 25, 2008

Have you ever really and truly thought about how far 26.2 miles would take you? Yesterday, while driving from Lexington up to Cleveland with Nick’s family, I not only witnessed what 26.2 miles looks like, mile post by mile post, I drove the entire distance in the car. I told Nick as we exited onto 271 that from this point to our exit in Shaker would be the distance of our marahon. Thanks to the nicely green posted mile markers, I watched each mile tick by until we reached the 26 mile marker. I felt so many emotions all in that 30 minutes of driving (yes, 30 minutes in the car, which you can only imagine it at a runners speed!); I felt motivated thinking about the feeling we will have after completing the run. I felt completely overwhemled and questioned myself and the probability of finshining. I have still not decided whether or not it was smart to sit there and take in the true distance; I mean sure on a tredmill you really arn’t able to comprehend the total distance, but driving it put it all in my mind. I ran 4 miles on Wednesday, and it was O.K. and yesterday Nick and I woke up early before the drive and I ran my 3 miles. We got to see Meghan for lunch on our way to Cleveland and it was nice seeing her and reminding myself even though I feel alone in the moments I am running and pushing through the challeneges, we are all in fact in this together. Meghan is without a doubt more ready for this training than I feel, but I will carry on. I think Meg had a good idea to hold our training at this week, and not one near the middle that is far more intense. I love my gym by the way!! I am so excited to find some classes I love and go on my off days to strength train. yay!!! Where you are you guys by the way? I am sending you both a little motivation in the mail, so look for it within the next few weeks!