My year from hell September 5, 2008

Please tell me every teacher has good years and bad years because I am having the worst year so far and I am trying to convince myself it is not me!!! With that sad, I have not been getting home until at least 6:30 every night since we started school. I am continuing to keep running as a pleasure and release not an obligation (though it is) but I just cant have the mentality it is something on my to do list, because that is too long as is everyday. Running is becoming my release. I ran 5 last night, in the night and it was awesome. I got so much out and came to work the next morning refreshed.

I cant write much tonight…it is nearly 9 and I am just now laying down on the sofa to relax with Nick. Oh yeah, I am going back to school in the spring (or next fall)…I am just getting so fed up with the way public schools work. I will go into that later I have so much to write about but I am just way too exahusted tonight…it will have to wait until tomorrow.

4 miles – Silvia September 3, 2008

By the time I got home from school around 6:30 pm, it was still 85 degrees outside and humid. There was no way I was running in this weather.  So off to the gym I go.  I felt guilty today as I saw a woman running carrying a water bottle.  That’s what I should be doing, not going to the gym.  Think of the carbon footprint I am leaving.  I am driving to the gym, to run in an air conditioned  and artificially lit facility  on an electric treadmill.  Seems kind of stupid, doesn’t it?  Unfortunately, that’s as far as my thoughts went.  I didn’t feel guilty enough to turn the car around to run outside.

So, I get to the gym and weigh myself.  154.  I lost 6 pounds.  ONLY 6 pounds.  For the past ten days I have had no processed foods, no sugar, no alcohol, no caffeinated coffee ;and, in my few cups of decaf, I used unsweetened soy milk.  I ran 48 miles.  I didn’t even have dessert, Tiramisu (mmmmmm), at my husband’s boss dinner party.  Actually, all I ate at the lovely catered affair was salad!  After all that, only 6 pounds.  I felt like a biggest loser contestant who knew they were about to be voted off.  Dejected, I walked into the gym to do my run.

I passed this guy on a treadmill, who I could tell was going fast with his long strides.  I looked and he had a speed of 8.1!!!  He already did 4 miles and was going strong.  8.1!  I don’t even know how fast that was.  I put my mill on, and set it at 6.5.  I could see Mr. Runnerman gliding a few treadmills to my left.  Make me sick.  Anyway, I run and think how boring this was.  I brought my Ipod, but the connection to the headphone doesn’t work, so I had to take that whole contraption off my head.  I was so bored.  I wish I was outside.  The TVs are not in a good place, but I couldn’t hear them anyway.  I just kept looking at the seconds tick by and the miles slowly pile on. So boring.  I hate running.

Finally, at 3.8 with only the magical .2 to go I decided to risk it all and set the treadmill for 8.0!  I bolted. I was running my little heart out trying to keep pace, willing myself to keep going.  Only a little more,  You can do it. Come on. Finally I saw 4.00 come on the screen,  and mercifully,  the treadmill slowed down to the Cool Down phase.  8.0 was a 7:30 mile per minute pace.  Unbelievably fast.  How do people run so fast over such a long distance?  Then I remembered the marathon runners who ran at about a 5:04 or so pace.  That’s just insane.  I was in awe of the elite runners.

For Women Only… 14 miles -Silvia September 2, 2008

Yup, I did it.  I ran 14 miles.  More than half the total distance of 26.2.

I started earlyish.  Around 9am.  Just me and my dog and my Garmin 405 (I don’t leave home without it).  I left the Ipod at home.  I didn’t feel like having it around my head, getting all sweaty and getting caught in the wires, and having the wires get yanked out the bottom and then it stops and I have to plug it back in.  I couldn’t be bothered today.  I was focused on finishing.  I had a goal of doing it in 10 minute miles.  BUT, I really didn’t care.

I didn’t have a running belt with water bottles (the next thing on my wish list – hey!  I thought all you needed was a pair of sneakers and shorts, nope, this running thing is getting mighty expensive)  so I planned my route around the known fountains. At mile 4, I ran right into the “Nike Race for Human Race.”  There were even little cups of water at a stand.  I was tempted to take a cup.  I mean I was racing, I love humans.  But,   I didn’t.   I went to the water fountain instead, took a gulp, gave water to my dog and moved on.

There was a male runner ahead of me at about mile 5 and we were waiting at the light.  (I love lights because you HAVE to stop and wait for traffic….yay!)  We started out when the light turned green and he was ahead of me-of course.  That’s not unusual.  What was unusual was that he kept looking back.  He looked as if to see whether I was catching up.  Ya OK.  Do I look like I am competing guy?  For about a minute I matched his steps with mine, and I noticed that when I did that I got even further behind him.  His stride was longer and I actually had to take more steps to keep up with him.  So in reality I am actually a better runner.  Ha, well I let myself think that anyway.  Soon, he was just a speck in the distance.

At around mile 10 I encountered a problem. Before that, I stopped 2 more times, once to get water and once to let my dog poop.  I don’t count the times I wait blissfully at the lights – those are just bonus stops.  All of a sudden, I had an incredible, I mean incredible urge to use the bathroom.  I thought I was going to pee my pants.  Seriously.  I knew where there was another restroom and I hoped to hold until there.  All of a sudden, I guess I wasn’t really paying attention and lost my bearings, and I ended up at the Nature Center, which was closed.  Now, where was I going to go?   I eventually had to run this way but I was going to wait until I was relieved.  So, I am stuck in no mans land and I had no choice but to run  to the park with the restrooms.  I felt like a ball was pressing down on my bladder.  I didn’t want to walk because of my time.  (Don’t ask me why I cared, I don’t know why.)  So, every step was agony, running, holding, running, holding, running, holding.  If you have ever done that, you know that how obsessed your mind becomes about just wanting to let it all go, and release that pent up fluid and be freeeeeeeee.  I was so tempted.  I wish I was a guy who could just whip it out behind a tree and be done with it.  I do not like crouching in the woods, especially since they are public.  And with my luck I would end up with poison ivy or something equally as undesirable. I finally reach my destination.

I didn’t even tie my dog up. No time.  I took him right in there with me.   I WAS DESPERATE!!!  I sat down.  Three drops came out.  NO KIDDING.  What the @%#&?  All that agony for three drops.  I wash up and the pressure was still there.

I had 2 miles left.  I tookmy dog to his favorite swimming hole and let him swim for a couple of minutes.  I had 1 mile left.  (As you can see I take a lot of breaks- my goal is to finish a  marathon, I didn’t say I wasn’t going to stop in between).  As I ran home, I was now thinking that I might  have cancer or something.  The pressure on my bladder was still intense   I was so thirsty ( I need a running belt).  My mind had no distractions but to focus on the fact that I had to go pee but I didn’t have to go pee.  I played tricks with myself and just said let it go.  But nothing happened.  Now I was convinced something’s wrong with me.  Running  jarred something loose in my body and now I was dying. Great.  I wouldn’t  even be able to finish this damn marathon before I croaked. Finally, the 14 miles showed up on my Garmin, and I thankfully stop the timer and walk the rest of the 3/4 of a mile home.

I got home.  I ran to the privacy of my commode. Perhaps it was just the anxiety of being in a public restroom.  You know what I am talking about don’t you?  It’s just not as comfortable.   everything just work sbetter in your own bathroom. And finally, in the comfort of home, I find the cause of my pain.  Let’s just say my next move was to the medicine cabinet for some Midol.

Where has the last month gone?-Kirsten September 1, 2008

Yes, indeed it is me, finally. The truth is I am reading the blog, and realizing more with each day I need to get back into writing to hold myself accountable. I could not agree more, WHY ARE WE RUNNING A MARATHON? A half, that seems within my reach now, after doing my first 10 miles a few days ago, but add 16 to that, yeah thats a bit much!

Let me back up first. When we started this training program I have a summer free attitude; I could run when I wanted, sleep when I wanted, eat when I wanted, everything was not based around the hours on the clock. Well, 3 weeks ago I began teaching which is when my training became the hardest it ever has. I wake up at 5:45 to get to school, and there is no way I would run in the mornings. Then because of the wild class I have this year, I have been staying at work until close to 6 every night. Getting home at 6 after working with 23 5 year olds leads you to one goal; the couch and a drink. But add on a 5 mile run first!! Well it took me two weeks to get back into my routine, and now I am into my teaching groove and back into my running. I stopped blogging because I felt so behind…

But I am up to 10. I am not following the schedule exactly which maybe I should. One day I felt like running 6 when I only had to do 5, and then next day I only ran 3 when I have 4 to run. Doesnt that cancel eachother out, or is that a bad idea when training? I talked with a friend of mine who told me, it is ok to stop and walk. It doesnt mean you failed at your run, most people training use interval training techniques. So, the big numbers shall be conquered…one foot at time, with a few stops to walk when needed. I feel good mentally and physically which is the pay off for all of this. When I had my weeks of not running like I should have been, mentally I was all over the place. I had no place to release my stress and I felt horrible for not running. I actually dont mind the running…depending on the heat that is. If there are hills and heat I would rather curl up and die and every sprinkler I see on, I run into. I look like an idiot but hey it might have been what kept me from falling over and having a heart attack at age 24. I did my run on Saturday…8 miles. (I TOLD YOU I AM ALL OVER THE PLACE WITH THE SCHEDULE!!!) and the heat was 88, the incline was hell, and it hurt each step…so today I am waiting for the evening time. It is already too hot!!!

So about this half marathon in October….yes? no?

4 miles- Silvia August 29, 2008

Yesterday I should have run six miles according to the schedule.  I did 4.  I was exhausted. That’s my excuse.  The night before I couldn’t sleep well…first day jitters…even after 8 years of teaching!  Then when I finally could sleep, my darling husband began snoring.  Loudly.  I went downstairs to sleep in my son’s room (he’s off to college) and my dog decides it would be fun to play fetch at 3 am, and drops a tennis ball near my face.  I don’t think so.  I throw the ball away.  Duhhhh.  This is a dog.  Throwing the ball means playing fetch!  The tennis ball with drool was dropped neatly by my nose again.  This time, I put the ball in a drawer.  I couldn’t see his sad puppy dog eyes in the dark, so I felt OK about it.  I saw his shadwo lying in frot of the drawer, perhas willing it to open.  Eventaully he gave up and went away.  Meanwhile, it is 3:20 and I am trying desperately to get to sleep.  But there is added stress.  There is no alarm clock in my son’s room.  So, you know the kind of sleep you get when you know you have to wake up at a certain hour and there is no alarm clock to let you know the time and so you wake up every 20 minutes and look at the clock and feel relived that you have more time and mad because you woke up and you didn;t have to yet…well that’s what I had for the next 2 and half hours.  I arrived blearly eyed for the my first day of the new school year in a classroom full of high energy, eager middle schoolers.  Help me Lord geth through the day.  I did.

But the run.  Whose idea was it anyway to run this marathon?  I did not want to.  I wanted to go home, eat some food that I didn’t cook, have  a glass of wine and go to bed (before my husband so I fall asleep before he starts snoring).  But the run. I had to do that damn run.  I got home around 7:00.  I went to the gym.  I got up on the treadmill and at a mile 1.01 I was ready to call it a day.  I miss way back when I only had to run a couple of miles.  Nonetheless, I carried on and stopped at four.  I justified it by saying I’ll run 6 on Friday.

Today is Friday.  I finished day two in a classroom of energetic middle schoolers.  Do you think I feel like runnning six today?

Debris, Carnage 12 Miles – Silvia August 25, 2008

I had to laugh when the announcer commentating on the Olympic marathon predicted debris and carnage along the marathon route because the men went out at a blistering 2:04 pace, in the 84 degree temperature with high humidity. i expected bodies strewn all over the place where the men are prostrated on the road, drooling from their mouths. That didn’t quite happen, but it was a thrilling race to watch. I was so glad for the Kenyan who brought home that country’s first Olympic gold (were you as surprised as I was, finding out that little tidbit of information.)

The next morning I did my 12 mile run. I started late, after 11am. Dumb, dumb mistake. It was hot, almost 90 degress, the humidity was at about 60% and I had my dog. The good thing was that my husband made me a leash with some nylon rope so I wouldn’t have to lug around the heavy retractable leash. The bad thing was that we had no water. I know, call PETA on me. I knew there was a pavilion at the ark we were going to, so I was hoping that there was some sort of water there. I wanted to run at a 10 minute pace. I thought I could do that comfortably. The first 3 miles went well. I ran the first mile in 10 minutes, the second in 9:30 (oops- big mistake there) and the third in about 9:48. Then it went downhill. The sun was beating down on me; I was thirsty and felt the energy draining from me. Finally at mile 4, the pavilion loomed before me, like a lush oasis in the middle of the desert. I headed straight for the water fountain. As luck would have it there was a dog water bowl there, and I first filled it up for some water for Barclay, which he gladly lapped up. After I had my fill, I used the facilities. This is luxury – it had a flushing toilet sink, and mirror. Beachwood rocks! (This is the same spot that has wifi access.) I have to say – and you may want to turn away when I say this rather gross piece of information – but when it burned when I relieved myself. My body temperature was so hot. It scared me a little.

rested and refreshed we headed out. I have to say the next 8 miles were just torture. I stopped and walked. I ran. I slogged. I wanted to quit running and I remembered when the commentator mentioned that the Kenyan who won had a runner’s body – lean and light. He was 5′4″ and 112. What the hell am I doing out here at 5′6″ and 160? I have huge thighs, which makes me have more of a sprinter’s body. not a long distance body.

At one point when I had a tiny surge of energy my Garmin’s battery went low so it automatically stopped my timing. I must have ran at least a half mile…for nothing! When I figured that out I was so mad. I eventually made it to another park with another drinking fountain, not before I spent nearly minutes standing under a sprinkler with Barclay lying beside me. People went by us in their cars, laughing. I didn’t care and neither did Barclay the water felt so good. Finally, we hit Barclay’s swimming hole where he got to cool off again. By that time I had about 1 and half miles to go. I was spent. Barclay was refreshed. Oh well. I think I walked about a half mile and then decided to jog the rest.

I did 12 miles in 2 hours and 9 minutes. The men ran a whole mnarathon by that time. I felt dejected and defeated. But, I am not giving up.

4 miles- Silvia August 19, 2008

Home again, I thought the running would be easier.  It wasn’t.  The 4 miles were pure torture.  My dog’s retractable leash weighed a ton and my pace was so slow.  I finished.  I always finish, but I am getting sick of being so slow. 

Today I was especially annoyed at all the people walking their dogs and whenever their dogs saw my dog they went ballistic, barking and attacking and what not.  How irritating!

11 miles – Silvia August 19, 2008

I looked down at my Garmin 405 and read 4.66. Shit! I am not even half way done! I stopped. I can’t do this. I look ahead and see my dog look back at me as if to say, why are we stopping. Damn dog with limitless energy. I keep going.

The night before I watched the women’s marathon. I was amazed and enthralled with their super lean bodies and blistering pace, despite the announcer saying they were running at a “pedestrian” 5:30. Pedestrian! He even said that one of the runners was “slogging” along. Slogging? That’s my word…that’s me. That’s not them. I was “running” at a 11 minute mile pace – not consistently either.

Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth I ran along the 2 mile dirt road. I was getting sick of trees, mud, and weeds. I saw a deer take off and that was cool. I heard wld turkeys and wanted my dog to chase them for fun, but he didn’t. He was too busy staying ahead of me and then looking back and thinking, come on slowpoke.

I finished the 11 miles, on one hour and 59 minutes. Sick. The marathoners were practically done by that time. How in the hell am I going to run 26.2?

I did decide in my 2 hours of thinking and running and dehydrating ( I didnt have any water…stupid I know) to go on a diet. Perhaps I was delirious. But I can’t carry around these extra 4 bowling balls anymore. It’s just too hard. The day after my 11 miles, I could barely move. My mother is taking care of her husband, who is really sick, and needs a walker to move around. Believe me, I was eying that walker with envy. That’s how sore I was. So, starting Thursday (well maybe Friday because my hubby and I have date night Thursdays) I am going to try to make some lifestyle changes in my eating habits. I will keep you posted.

One more thing.  As I was getting ready for my run, I put on my hefty armor to hold in the girls because this was going to be a long run.  I  checked my luggage and I was aghast because I forgot my Vaseline.  Uh oh!  You know what that means…major chaffing.   So, I decided to improvise and used my Adidas deodorant in all the strategic spots.  I figured the chaffing is caused by the wetness rubbing against straps.  Guess what?  It worked.  There was no chaffing in the spots where I applied the deodorant.  Yippee!  I didn’t worry about blocking sweat glands or whatever because I sweat in so many places that it more than makes up for the lack of sweat near my buxom bosom.   Speaking of sweat.  My ears sweated so much that my headphones (the kind you wear over your ears with the foam over the speakers) were soaked and I could ring them out like a sponge!  YUCK!

Good-bye 3, Hello 4 – Silvia August 19, 2008

Week 6 was a milestone of sorts.  No longer would I have two 3 mile runs.  No, 3 miles are a thing of the past, it is now 4.  I remember when 4 was my longer middle run and now it is the norm.  I am writing this post because I dont want to do 4 miles today.  I would do 3, but 4 is so much longer.  Unfortunately the rain stopped and my run is looming over my head.

Last week I was visiting my mom.  She lives in the country, an hour north of Toronto. I ran the four miles along a dirt road that was pock marked with huge mud puddles, more like mini-ponds and holes.  There were ATV tracks all over the place.  Great for that, bad for running, unless you are a dog.  My dog had fun, dodging the puddles.  And when he was hot and tired he just lay in them, waiting for me to catch up.  Not me.  I tiptoed around them – secretly grateful for the chance to slow down and creep along.

The dirt road became very familiar during week 6.  It was about 2 miles long and I ran up and down for my  4 mile run.  I think I ran an extra mile I had to dodge the holes and water so much.  But my Garmin didn’t register all my agile weaving. I think it should give me extra mileage for all that effort.

10 Miles – Silvia August 10, 2008

The day after my “vacation” in hell, I did not feel like running, let alone running 10 miles. Nonetheless, that’s what my training chart said, so off I went with my Ipod and Garmin 405. Before I began I was sure to grease myself up like a pig in a hog wrestling competition. Lena suggested Body Glide and although we don’t have that store I will find that stuff somewhere.

My slowest mile, believe it or not was the first. I ran it in 11:11. I think my mind was telling my body, oh no, here comes that great big hill. My mind forgot that we were back home in Cleveland where flat means flat (unlike in WV where flat means rolling hills). I was blessed with cool weather today and a nice cool breeze. Ahhhhhhhhh. I dare say it was almost pleasurable. No I can’t say that. But I can say, it wasn’t torture.

When I hit mile 5, I could not believe how far I was- distance becomes so much more meaningful when you are running. A couple of interesting things happened during the run. First, what goes down must come up. I loved running the down hills and I hated when they became up hills later. I just want to run down hill and take a elevator up hill. Also, at around the 5 mile mark I really had to use the facilities. I mean really. And to make matters worse it was number 2. I mean, here I am running, exhausted, and now my mind is distracted by another body part demanding attention. Why don’t they have Porta-Potties strategically placed throughout the trail. ( I was on a lovely asphalt all purpose trail- Beachwood put a lovely all-purpose trail in the middle of a boulveard- it is a little bit of nature in the middle of the city). So I thought there must be facilities in the shaded rest area I spotted a mile back (where they also have Wifi!!!!). If I just make it back I will get relief. So, I ran and ran and by the time I hit that area, I was over the urge. Thank God. Good bowels-way to hold back for the team! Still in the netherlands, I had a bad battle with chaffing down under. Ughhh. Even though I wore capri style pants thus hoping to eliminate any chaffing, it didn’t work. I was so sweaty it felt like I peed my pants. I know, gross. I was running with that feeling. The last interesting thing was that when I finally finished the 10 miles (I literally ran the last 0.10 miles looking at my Garmin waiting for the 10.00 to come up so I can stop my watch and stop running-I refuse to run one step more than I have to). I wiped my face with my hand and felt crunchiness like dirt. That’s wierd. So I tasted the dirt and it was salt! The air was so cool I guess the sweat quickly eavporated from my face and left salt crystals. When I got home and looked in the mirror there was a whole bunch of salt crystals framing my face. I thought that was pretty cool.

I did it! 10 miles and week four, or is it five, is done!